Clyde & Me
by loveandzelink
Summary: I didn't find it funny how I wanted the Goddesses to kick him out of Hyrule, but they'd rather send messages only for him to hear... or so he claimed. And the one way I could prove him insane? Make a deal, of course. In which I gave up my single status and begin a so-called life-changing experience for the truth of his connection to the Goddesses, and to me. Modern Zelda/OC.
1. it's you

**chapter one**

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><p><strong>.x.<strong>

"Help me, Zelda."

"No," I scoffed, seeing that _only_ Clyde would be making demands in the middle of an incoming snowstorm. "Do you even hear yourself? Do you really think I would want to be involved with a ruthless Hyrulean gang? _Do you wanna die?_"

Even though it was my intention for Clyde to feel like crap, he already appeared like so. His flushed face was burning to the touch and dotted with perspiration; this moron was ill to the bone, yet he was on his knees, shivering and begging, "Please, Zelda, you—" Rather predictably, he was cut off by a nasty cough, "—Zelda, if it's not you, then my brother can't be saved." At this, I blinked wildly at the idea his brother would be involved with the scum of Castle City. "He did this for me, Zelda, he chose Rakau over her and the guilt's a parasite, eating at me alive—"

"Stop right there," I interjected coolly and held up a gloved hand. "So your brother is in trouble. What do you want me to do?"

Moments passed as Clyde caught his breath, clearly having a difficult time. "I-I her-heard," he started speaking and sinking simultaneously, "the-that you f-ff-found how to rid of that-the…" Trailing off, cough after cough escaped from his throat. "T-the imp poe, y'know."

Rolling my violet eyes skyward, I retorted, "Don't you think nasty ghosts and nasty gangs are two different problems?"

"Please," Clyde stressed, his hand grasping a corner of my coat. His cardigan sleeve rode down, revealing a string of blessed colored pearls. How pretty they were on the most uncompromising, unbending blockhead I had the misfortune of meeting. "You have to help me."

"You must be out of your _goshdamn mind_ if you think that I_ have to_ help you."

"Then help my brother."

He had a point there. "Why do you think I can help him?"

At this, Clyde had sunk further on the ground. His descent was subtly freaking me out when he was closing in on himself. However, his head was bowed before me and his hands reached out to cling to my boot, and for some inexplicable reason, his position reminded me of how we would pray before our gracious Goddesses.

"Because I know," Clyde gasped, his words almost muffled by the snow, "I know that you, Zelda, Princess of Hyrule, are Hylian."

**.xx.**

I'm sure we're all familiar with the legend of the Goddesses' Creation of the World. My mother often saved that little story for my bedtime. I can still remember her warm figure hugging mine when a grown woman couldn't possibly squeeze into a bed fit for a child. We managed, somehow, and I would laugh with her fingers delicately in my hair and my head tucked underneath her chin. It was the best position to hear her voice, anyway.

Even though I haven't heard her in a very long time, I think I remember how it goes.

The Golden Goddesses cured Hyrule of her darkness, and laid down their individual blessings. As there were three goddesses, they laid down three elements of their own: the land, the law, and life. Din, who created the land, sculpted impressive mountaintops of great heat and white snow, but also of soft valleys that flowed with picturesque flora. Nayru, who created the law, sought peace and bonded Hyrule together with her wisdom. Then there was Farore, who created life, who is worshiped as our First Mother for bringing all assortments of life onto Din's land and those life would be tasked to uphold Nayru's law.

Particularly, the Hylians were the most connected to the Three Goddesses. After all, it has been said that Hylians were characterized by their long ears for the purpose of listening to the messages of the Goddesses. Still, it's only been a rumor so far. A baseless one at that since I can attest to the false hopes I held when I thought there was a possibility for the truth. Somehow, and in some twisted way of all stars turning against me, the truth happened to be a human moron named Clyde.

Ugh, _Goddesses_, smite me now_._

**.xxx.**

_I'm so hungry. _

My violet eyes were somewhat concentrated on the menu of the hospital cafeteria. Although I was perfectly capable of reading, I was much too starved to strain my eyes. It took a couple moments, before I gave up. Collapsing into an empty chair, I lowered my forehead onto the cold tabletop. The dining area was vacant, probably because the clock ticked way past midnight.

As I was daydreaming of a late delicious dinner, there was the clicking and clacking of pearls.

"Hey."

I looked up momentarily before groaning, "Go away."

Of course, he didn't listen to me as he stole the unoffered seat in front of me. In defiance, I buried my head further into my forearms and refused to look at him, until he nudged my arm. Groaning, I glanced up to see that he was extending a plastic bag, radiating warmth.

Mumbling along the lines of gratitude, I swept the bag toward me and opened its contents.

Inside was a gift that must had been created by his culinary genius brother. With no time to spare, I popped open the first case and found some sort of seafood pasta with the shells and I thought I smelled Reekfish, which was always appetizing for me. Out of the corner of my eye, Clyde was extending a fork to me, and I accepted just because hunger called.

After a few minutes into stuffing my face thoughtlessly, I realized Clyde was staring at me the entire time.

"Um," I started, searching for napkins. He handed those to me as well. "Can you not?"

His eyes flashed with an infuriating glint. "Can I not what?"

He was so funny that I had to laugh, "You wanna die?"

Clyde laughed as well. "Why'd you always ask me that?" A pause was offered for my answer, but I only responded with a narrow-eyed scowl. It proved to be minimally effective when he smiled and said, "Y'know, you have an awful big appetite for a young lady your age."

Again, I was laughing, but with the tips of my fingers against my parted mouth. "How dare you." Swiping nonexistent crumbs from the table, I tightened my smile. "I'll have you know that I'm a lovely, growing girl."

"Y'know," Clyde chuckled, daring to further his teasing, "I heard that this particular, lovely, growing girl can't cook to save—"

"No!" I interjected, hurling my fork. "I won't hear of it, jerk!"

The fork missed him, but he appeared hurt, just a little. There was a twitch of his mouth, however that was quickly smoothed over as he stared at me a moment longer and disquieted. "You're... you're not hurt too bad, are you?"

Honestly, I knew he felt mostly at fault so it was my obligation to reply, "Minor injuries." Clyde seemed to be happy about that since he did beg me to make certain of his brother's return. Speaking of, I piped casually, "How's Lloyd?"

"I was with him for the past hours." Clyde sighed, staring beyond my head. "And I would've right now, but Abi made me check up on you." With a small tilt of his head, Clyde returned his gaze onto me. "She told me how you swooped in and saved them with your hella mad magic."

"Thanks." Unable to fight the urge, I sacrificed the smallest of smiles. "Aren't you supposed to be dying right now?"

Clyde shook his dark head. "Nah. I'm right as rain." I took his idiom for truth when he appeared to visibly lose the flushing and the coughing. He paused then and inhaled deeply. "Listen, Zelda, what you did—"

Lifting the empty case, I waved it before him. "We're even."

Thankfully, he closed his mouth into a satisfied smile. Then he reached into the bag to pull out a tinier tin, before pulling the top off. Inside was my most favorite dessert in the entirety of Hyrule. At once, I accepted the jelly beans and even allowed him to remain staring at me. I was much more comfortable if he wasn't talking to me, anyway. The Goddesses must had been smiling down at me when Clyde decided thirty seconds of silence was long enough.

"Zelda."

Placing a bean onto my tongue, I sniffed in distaste. "You can leave now."

"Go out with me."

"_Pfffft_." My first reaction was to look up at him with a sarcastic smile. "You must be truly desperate if you're asking me."

But when Clyde smiled, there was certainly a plan behind it. "No, it's not desperation."

"Isn't it?" A thought crossed my mind and I distractedly ran my fingers through my ponytail. "If it's not desperation, then what is it?"

"It's you," he drawled. "You should be my girlfriend."

It was my second reaction to blurt, "But why should I do that?"

At once, his gaze lowered onto the case of jelly beans before me. With deliberation, he rested his forearms on the table and leaned toward me. With a stupid smug stupid smile, he whispered, "We're even."

A moment passed in silence. "Excuse you? That's not even!" A forced laugh passed my lips as I plucked a jelly bean pointedly. "Like when was food ever equivalent to giving up my single relationship status? Clyde! Don't laugh—" This time when my fork was launched in his direction, it succeeded in contact. As Clyde rubbed his forehead, I added on, "Isn't there like a law that Nayru declared that guys shouldn't exchange food for a lady's company?"

"Um." Clyde paused as the amusement played on his dumb face. "I don't recall Nayru declaring anything of the like."

"Are you sure?"

His arm moved slightly, which clicked the colored pearls along his wrist. "Awful sure, Your Highness."

"Precisely." There was a moment when I had to remember the conversation at hand. It was imperative that the topic dies down when there was no chance on Din's green ground that I would be Clyde's girlfriend. _Ugh. _"You're not even supposed to be addressing me by my name. I should have you in the dungeons for inappropriate address."

"But you don't."

"Not yet!" I waved my hand around. "What in Hyrule makes you think you can go out with me—"

"You, Princess Zelda, Hyrule's dearest heiress to the crown."

A small scowl touched my lips. "Exactly, so give her several, suitable reasons for why you should even consider going out with _her—_I mean, me."

Clyde laughed lowly. "Just one will do."

"Try me," I snapped, sounding like I was brushing him aside, but I wasn't so sure. "Convince me then."

And his genius answer was, "I can hear the Goddesses."

Moments passed as we stared at each other. After blinking at him approximately twenty-seven times, I did not dare to break our stare while pulling out my phone. "So... where do you hear the Goddesses?"

Clyde furrowed his forehead like my question was dumb. "In... my... _head?_"

"Right." I nodded and pressed numbers into my phone. "In your head."

Now that Clyde was the one blinking in confusion, he questioned exactly what I wanted to hear, "Why do you ask?"

"WELL," I started, lifting the phone to my ear, "when someone tells you that they hear voices in your head, the normal reaction is to—" Rather dramatically, I cut myself off so I could speak to the operator, "Yes, is this the Happy Mask Mental Hospital?"

Instantaneously, Clyde stole my phone and dropped the call. As I scoffed, "Rude," Clyde laughed in disbelief. "Zelda, I'm not mentally ill."

"Are you sure?! Because if you're not insane, then you must be a liar."

A wide grin curved his mouth. "Who said I'm lying?"

"I said you're lying!" I exclaimed because he was an ignorant man-child. "Do you know not even I—and I'm a Hylian like you must be reminded—not even I can hear the Goddesses?!" I paused then, remembering that he may had discovered a loophole. "Clyde, it doesn't count if you're some so-called man of the Goddesses."

He responded with an uproar of laughter.

Turning away from him, I mumbled, "I'm serious."

Turning toward me, he chuckled, "So am I." Thankfully, he could sense my obvious agitation, so he opted for a different approach. Leaning back, Clyde suggested, "Listen, let's get real. Here's what I'll let you do." Intrigued, I glared at him just to observe his animated expression. "I'll allow three questions. Just three, Zelda. I'll answer them with the truth—the Goddesses will judge me if I don't—before you decide for yourself."

That sounded fair enough, although three questions wouldn't get me near the truth as I'd like. "Fine," I huffed, thinking quickly, "if you can hear the Goddesses, show me the evidence."

He sputtered a mixture of a laugh and a scoff. "Zelda, I said a question, not a demand."

"Does it matter? If you can hear the voices of the Goddesses, then can you talk to them now?"

"No," he answered confidently. That just marked a point against him, but he couldn't give up that stupid smile. "Look, I don't think you understand that it's not my right to spark a conversation whenever I want. The Golden Goddesses does have all of Hyrule to look after when she's not exactly in her greatest state. I thought you'd know that, Your Highness."

As he was laughing again, I inquired dryly, "Why did they chose you of all mortals?"

At this, he had taken offense, but that was my intention. Now that I was the one snickering, Clyde had adopted a pensive expression. He studied me, before saying, "I can't tell you everything just yet." I was about to argue _why not_ when he promised me his wholehearted honesty, but he spoke first, "There's a bunch to this answer that I can't explain on the spot. All I can say is the Goddesses didn't choose me. They didn't mean to choose anyone at all."

His answer only incited a mass of questions to stack into my mind, but I could only choose one. This was tricky for me since I didn't want to believe him, yet I wanted the option with the most thorough clarification. At an impasse, I remembered how Clyde and I were even involved in this preposterous conversation.

"Why do you want to go out with me?"

Clyde chuckled, leaning into me. "Because." Up close, I could count the multiple piercings in his face (does this kid even love himself?) and that his eyes were an average green, not the malevolent amber of Hyrulean legend's king of evil. "Because it's you, Zelda."

I poked his chest and smiled sweetly. "You really wanna die, huh?"

"Alright. Let me break it down for you." Clyde smiled as if a rather poor apology. "The Goddesses don't make that much of conversationalists, y'know?" I supposed he was alluding to the fact that I was Hylian, yet I couldn't hear any holy voices. "They wouldn't talk to me unless they were the desperate ones. Which is how I even got to work for them, handling all sorts of missions, like a sort of goddesses-sent agent?"

When he burst out laughing, I didn't think that he was taking this seriously anymore. Just as I was about to take the empty case and whack him with it a couple times, he stopped infuriating me enough to disclose, "It's a shorter story than the last answer, but that's all low key." As if to close the deal, Clyde edged closer into my personal space. "But I can tell you right now that these missions are probably the only evidence you'll get. They're all pretty righteous and I'm saying in the literal sense too, y'know?"

For a moment, I had to ponder his answer. "What does this have to do with me?"

"Nah, Zelda." Shaking his head, Clyde was laughing to himself. "The arrangement was that you'd question three times, I'd give you three answers, and then you'd give me one of your own. If you'd really wanted to know that, you'd have to —"

"_Fine_."

"Fine?" he mimicked and tacked on, "Fine, what?"

Goddesses, he was unbearably obnoxious. Why did they have to talk to him? It was almost physically painful that I couldn't tell him off, seeing that I was sucked into his crappy claims. "Fine. I accept your dumb deal." I capitulated. "Oh my Gods, this is insane."

Clyde frowned. "Zelda, don't state their names in vain."

"Go away."

Surprisingly, Clyde swept onto his feet and turned to the window where we could see the dotted sky, both by stars and snow. "The Goddesses are real, y'know."

"Get out."

Clearly, he didn't listen to me when he glanced back at me, all gloried grinning. "Miracles like this don't come by so often."

I scoffed. "What do you mean by that?"

With a pointed hand between us, Clyde gesticulated at him and me. "I just got you to go out with me, of course." He had the nerve to forward his hand towards me. I bit back a growl as his fingers lifted a long lock of my amber hair. "I could see the look in your eyes is a slight more murderous than the usual."

Smacking his hand aside, I snapped, "Can you blame me?"

But then Clyde took a seat onto the table with my wrist in his cold fingers. "No, I guess not." Green eyes stayed straight onto my cold countenance and, on his, Clyde was smiling. "You were never awful fond of me, y'know?"

As if I would let him touch me for long. Instantly, I yanked my hand out of his and, a tad unnerved, I looked away. My reply was a mumble low enough for him to hear, "I'm not going out with him." His pierced eyebrow lifted in confusion. Tipping my chin up, I did not miss an opportunity to grin with bared teeth and sardonic intention, "It's with the madman who threw his pride aside to beg me to save his brother."

He had the audacity to mirror my grin and gave a small chuckle, "How clever."

"I know I am. As if you could ever get on my level." I stood up, collected the empty cases into the plastic bag, and walked away from him. "Go away."

Of course, Clyde followed me as I made my way to the disposal area. Watching me, he mused aloud, "You're right. I can't compare. And that I should get going." Just as I thought he was finally going to leave me alone, he handed me a green bottle. "I heard you like tea."

_Sea Flower Green Tea_.

Popping the top off, I sent him off with a dismissive wave of my hand. With that, Clyde swept his cardigan around himself with a barely audible goodbye. That didn't bother me at all as I tipped the bottle and drank.

My mouth was hit with a liquid variation of sweet grass and sea salt.

I thanked the Goddesses I was right beside the disposal area because I spat that unpalatable swallow into the trash and straightaway focused my livid glare onto Clyde. Before I could yell at him, he waved with a maddeningly great grin and declared his farewells, "_Sea_ you later, darlin'."

Apparently, that night, Impa found me screaming bloody murder, but mostly along the lines of, "_Do you wanna die?! Huh, you punk-butt priest?! You wanna die?!_"

[...]

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><p><strong>please read! very important! read me!<strong>

**That's chapter one! Unfortunately, this chapter didn't cover as nearly as much as I wanted. Therefore there's some things as a jsyk.**

**First and foremost, because my OC is a priest-in-training, this story deals heavily with RELIGION, especially in a modern setting. Since the Legend of Zelda doesn't have a detailed description of the Three Goddesses religion, I will be taking creative liberty to fill in the blanks. However, I'm not that great writer to create a whole, new religion for the Three Goddesses, so I will be borrowing from our world's religions.**  
><em><strong>Let me provide an example: <strong>_**as mentioned in this chapter, Clyde wears a rosary. However, it's not made of beads, but of tiny colored pearls. I used pearls instead, b/c if one recalls from Wind Waker, there were quest items called the **_**Goddesses Pearls**_**. The rosaries also have the Triforce, instead of the crucifix, and there will be a correct way to pray the rosary as Clyde will demonstrate later on.  
>If anyone remembered some sort of religious information that was canon in any LoZ games, then it would help me out greatly with fleshing out the Three Goddesses religion. Please send me a PM! If you're anonymous (or logged in), please leave a review :)))<strong>

**Secondly, this is not an AU. It's modern universe, but the only canon characters will be Princess Zelda and Impa. There will be Zoras, Gorons, Fairies, ect, but they'll all be OCs, as well as humans OCs. There will also be a very apparent issue concerning the Hyruleans and the humans, but this **_**is not**_** to be resolved in this story. Which brings my third point.**

**Thirdly, this story takes place before a Zelink story that will be centered on the aforementioned issue. The story will be collaboration with **_Eternal Nocturne_**. If you hadn't heard of **_Eternal Nocturne_**, then you must check her out b/c her Zelink fics are absolutely amazing. Even though this story is centered on Zelda/OC, Zelink is my OTP, so this story will have Zelink hints here and there.**

**I'd love to hear what you guys think! Thanks,**

**~ loveandzelink**


	2. I just want to know you

**Chapter Two**

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><p><strong>.x.<strong>

"If I had heard you correctly..." Slowly, Impa lowered her mug onto the table and turned her head to the side, her eagle eyes watching me. "You were propositioned by a young man who claims to have the ability to hear the Three Goddesses. In exchange for permitting your investigation, you have agreed to be his..."

As much as I didn't want to, I finished for my dear caretaker. "His girlfriend."

In response, Impa closed her scarlet eyes, almost as though in peace. The irony. "Indeed. We cannot neglect the fact that you had broken off this alleged arrangement a few hours after you had accepted."

"Right." I nodded along, breaking into a strained smile. "I only consented to the same arrangement, because he apologized for ahhh—a wrongdoing." As if he could have fooled me and not bear any consequences. Although it was somewhat perplexing to hear that he'd rather beg me back than leave me alone. To think he said it wasn't desperation. "I'm dating. Again."

Moments passed as Impa scrutinized me extensively for any irregularities. She ended up in a controlled sigh and pressed her uniformed fingers against her temple. Impa rarely mumbled, but she did so, most likely not addressed to me. "The princesses were not like this before—"

Suddenly, my phone chirped. My fingers immediately made to silence my mobile, however Impa shifted hers away from her head and barely lifted them up, then down. With that, my violet eyes flickered over the phone screen.

**Finn: Miss Zelda! R u w/ Sir Impa rn? ヽ ( ꒪д꒪ )ﾉ**

Even though I loved Impa like my own mother, Finn had a reason to be calling Impa that. As a central member of my father's closest circle, Impma adopted a sort of authoritative attitude when it comes to most matters. When it came to me however, Impa made certain to show affection, but to people like Finn who might possibly be her exact opposite, Impa was a little less than a military commander. In hopes of turning that around, I requested my guardian to change her armored wear to a modest pantsuit and cut her tight white bun to a flowing asymmetrical bob.

A little curve touched my lips as I said, "I just need to send a quick message."

"Certainly."

With my phone underneath the table, I tapped at the keys, before sending my reply.

"Was that the Head Chef?"

"Huh?" I lifted my amused stare onto my guardian, flipping the phone's screen onto my thighs. "Oh, yeah, it's Finn."

A shadow of disapproval passed Impa's eyes. That passed just too quickly as she lifted her warm mug to her impassive expression. In reality, Impa had collection of impassive faces, and this one looked exactly like when she swordfights. Taking a small sip, Impa thought aloud, "I can still recall when I received the message from the Eastern Zora River estate that you lost consciousness under his supervision."

"There were no long-term effects, however," I piped up, recalling as well when Impa banned me from seeing Finn again. I had to play a barrel of tears, before I was allowed her permission again. "Speaking of that particular estate, my beau is the younger brother of the current lord."

Impa stared at me. "I did not have the impression that you were fond of nobles, Highness."

"I'm not fond of him, period," I said, thinking of my 'boyfriend'.

At the thought of him, my nose scrunched as Impa's hands folded before her. "Zelda, you must set a date where I can speak with him." Before I could object, a single palm raised towards me. "It is mandatory, you see."

_No. Nooooo. Oh, Goddesses, please nooooooooooo._

"Oh, um, of course, Impa," I started, "I would absolutely—"

Thankfully, the Goddesses heard my prayers when my cell vibrated against my thigh. Without checking the caller ID, I remarked, "Sorry, Impa, I really have to take this, like right now. Pardon me." Walking away from that mess of a conversation, I moved my headband slightly away from my ear, before answering, "Yes?"

"Hey."

"Hey!" I repeated, a tad more violently. "Do you not understand what of a huge mess you've just—"

"Yeah, I don't want to know."

I laughed. "You wanna die?"

"I'm sure you'll be the death of me." He chuckled as well, and I felt a sudden urge to launch my phone into the nearest window. Instead, I listened to him say, "So I've been thinking we should be in the same proximity soon, since we're going out, y'know?"

"I'm an incredibly busy princess, you see." Rolling my eyes, I snapped, "What in Hyrule makes you think I'll make time for you?"

"I learned how to make panna cotta yesterday."

A moment passed in silence. "What day are you free?"

**.xx.**

After I had promised Impa to call in the case of an emergency about thirty-three times, I stared blankly in a foreign neighborhood. This was not what I signed up for. There was an eerie silence to this place, and as storylines of Redead-ridden streets filled my head, I recognized a certain someone striding toward me.

"Hey," Clyde called and grabbed my wrist. "It's this way."

"You said 1209 Northe—"

"I know what I said." He looked back at me, grinning. "C'mon."

Rolling my violet eyes, I stayed quiet as he led us to his home by climbing through people's backyards, before reaching his own. After he unlocked his back door, we were immediately ambushed by the inside residents. But it was an adorable ambush when two retrievers were digging their snouts into my coat.

Bending down to their level, I scratched behind their soft ears with a giddy smile. "Hello, ladies."

I was most certain they barked 'HELLO!' while Clyde made the few steps into the kitchen, all high-class stainless steel, or something of that nature. Curious, I rose and was about to join him when Clyde noticed, immediately pointing to the other side of the counter.

"Please stay behind here," he indicated.

"What! Why?!"

"It's brother's rule, y'know—"

I cut him off with an insulted sniffle and plopped onto a stool with the dogs curling underneath my feet. On the other side, Clyde was doing whatever cooking was. As I recalled, he promised me a panna cotta, which instantly elevated my mood. Leaving him with that, I opened my hobo bag to pull out a purple pen and notebook, flipping it to the first page.

"So," I started, staring into his downward expression, "you're allowing me full access to all that you know about your alleged ability to hear the Goddesses."

Clyde halted, looking up at me skeptically. "I thought I wanted a date, Zelda."

"As far as I know, this is a social engagement." My hand reached back to flip back my ponytail, which Clyde responded by furrowing his forehead. "This was your idea. I just get to pick the conversation topic today. So you're gonna let me or—"

"I guess."

His answer irked me when he was the one that brought up this whole thing. I bit down an annoyed scoff, before tapping the page with the pen's end. Clyde noticed, bringing his green gaze away from the stovetop and onto the page, which was labeled across the top, **Project Boy Who Thinks He Can Hear the Goddesses AKA Project BWTHCHtG. **

"That's terrible," Clyde commented and then he stole my pen from my fingers. As I whacked his shoulder, he crossed out my title and wrote in his own, before pulling away with a broad grin. "This is much better, y'know."

When my gaze returned to the page, I read aloud, "Project Clyde & Me?" It sounded much more moronic out loud since Clyde was laughing to himself. "Why is your name first?"

"Project Me & Clyde has no charisma, y'know."

Just as I was about to declare my rebuttal, Clyde interrupted me to say, "I thought you wanted your interrogation."

"Right." Ignoring his choice of words, I reached into my bag again. "Just one more thing."

While he was doing something with apples, Clyde watched as I pulled out my camcorder and set the device facing him. Checking that he was in the shot, I looked back to Clyde, nodding along. "Are you ready?"

Shaking his head, Clyde carried the camcorder onto a cupboard. This way, it would be filming the both of us. "This is about me and you, y'know."

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, sure, whatever. You ready?" He nodded which gave me the incentive to press play on the camcorder. After checking the red light blink, I scanned my notebook for the first question. "State your full name."

Taken aback a bit, he slowly said, "Clyde Matten Lloydpierceson."

"Huge nerd Lloydpierceson," I affirmed what I heard, which succeeded in having the opposite effect as Clyde burst into laughter. "State your current age."

"Eighteen."

Three years my senior. So old. Why was he so old?

"It's not that old," Clyde retorted, giving me a look. He left a pan on the stove—I think—and added on, "Adulthood was like, what, seventeen?"

"Moving on," I yawned. Tapping my lower lip, I read the next sentence. "State your occupation."

Clyde paused for a moment. "I would say priest-in-training, but the formal term would be a seminarian. I'm a seminarian for the Temple of Time."

"Temple of Time?" I repeated back dubiously. "I thought a guy like you who can literally hear the Goddesses would attend the Temple of Times Triangle."

At the mention of that particular religious institution, Clyde shook his dark head. "The beliefs of the Temple of Times Triangle are not the beliefs of the Goddesses." While he was still able to cook or something, Clyde was ruminating on this particular subject. "While smaller and less supported, the Temple of Time has followed the beliefs of the Goddesses."

A moment passed before I spoke up, "Did the Goddesses tell you that?"

Peering up at me, he smiled. "They did."

"Speaking of," I intoned and checked my notebook, "when did you first hear the Goddesses?"

His gaze on the counter top, Clyde spoke succinctly, "The accident. I was five."

I was aware of this accident, however it was necessary for him to state it aloud for clarification. "The accident as in the Southern Lake Hylia bombing?" It took a moment before Clyde nodded. "What did the Goddesses say?"

He smiled. "Goddess. Singular. There was a voice in my head who told me to take the Zora eggs. I didn't know it then, but the voice belonged to Nayru."

_My goddess, out of all goddesses. _

"And after that?"

This time, Clyde stopped everything he was doing. Moments passed in deep silence before he thought it formidable to reply. "The Goddesses were just as surprised as I was. Y'know, they heard that the mortal-made rumor that the Hylians could hear the Goddesses before, but not that that was any true. They never expected that would happen, especially to a human like myself. They wanted to leave me alone, but I was curious, y'know." At this, Clyde smiled sheepishly. "They struck up a deal between me and them."

Absolutely interested, I inquired, "What deal was that?"

"Hmm." He paused. "I'm real sorry about this, Zelda, but I can't tell you what we both want. Or even what the Goddesses will do for me when I have carried out my part. I can tell you that, my part of the deal. Which is that I have to complete the missions for them."

"Right, the missions thing."

"The only evidence you'll get, Your Highness," he said with a wink. My eyes must had rolled to the back of my head. "Let me break it down for you."

I tucked an amber lock into my headband before Clyde began. "The missions are undoing the glitches."

"Glitches?" I repeated and wrote that down.

"Glitches," Clyde assured, grinning greatly. "That's what I call them."

It was predictable that I asked, "Why glitches?"

If it was even possible, Clyde's grin spread wider. "Think of it this way." Pausing for dramatic effect, he declared slowly, "Life is a video game."

Again, I asked, "Why a video game?"

Unable to contain his laughter, Clyde snickered, "Because I like video games."

My lips curved into a scowl. "You wanna die?"

Chuckling, he continued with his bizarre explanation, "It makes sense, okay? So video games is life." At this, he was laughing and I raised my notebook. "Life is a video game. It's primarily a system where if everything goes according to the programming, you would go through certain events and, in a sense, win. But sometimes, there are moments that seem out-of-place, y'know." I nodded, surprised that I could follow along so easily. "Maybe your character is walking through walls and doors or in the eternal sky or fighting in a dungeon seven years too early."

"The glitches," I clarified.

"Exactly. While most glitches are harmless, there are those that can complicate your adventure. I know, most of the time, we can just restart the game, but you can't necessarily restart life, y'know?" Again, I nodded. "There are some 'glitches' in life that are basically events that were not fated to transpire. At least that's what the Three Goddesses told me. Since they don't have mortal hands to undo these glitches, it's my job to be sort of like the programmer who makes sure the glitch is out of the system. I am the metaphorical programmer of misplaced fates."

After transcribing that all down, I stared at Clyde for several moments. "So what kind of glitches are we talking about here?"

"Hold on a sec." His back turned toward me as he walked toward the refrigerator. Turning back to me, he returned with what could only be panna cotta and laid it onto the countertop, before answering, "Erm, well, I'd think the glitches are a bunch of random stuff. With the last mission, I had to help a guy find forever homes for fifty rabbits and then reunite the guy with his estranged wife." With a small shake of his head, Clyde smiled as he plopped a panna cotta molding onto a clean plate. "They come by the temple for couples counseling, y'know."

"That sounds wonderful." Starry-eyed, I dropped my pen and reached for a fork. "Let's have a break."

For some reason, Clyde stopped me from grabbing an eating utensil. "Not yet."

I frowned. "Why not?"

"I want you to tell me about yourself," he said, tilting his head slightly to meet my stare. In response to my narrowed-eyed scowl, he answered an unspoken question, "I just want to know you, darlin'."

"You wanna die?"

Rising to a full stand, Clyde sighed. "Not even one thing?"

In response, I lowered my palm out for a fork. It appeared that he had given up as he handed me one, but I felt a sort of obligation to him and decided to surprise him by breaking the silence. "When I was younger, I watched my friends die." His widened stare blinked in disbelief, but before he could comment, I shook my head with my ponytail whipping my cheek. "What about you?"

"On this same subject?" I nodded which Clyde replied with a shrug. "Rakau got beat up a lot because he wasn't human. I intervened at first because it wasn't right, but after that, it was just 'cause he grew on me. He let me hang around with the Zora crowd a lot after that." It appeared being the closest companion to a Zora prince would have its perks. Although, the other humans had wanted to befriend me for all the wrong reasons. Those memories rose into my mind for a moment, and I sighed in thought. "Hey, Zelda."

"What?"

As I sliced a piece of panna cotta onto my fork, I heard Clyde say clear as day, "They didn't drown." My fork crashed onto the counter top. I didn't think I heard him right. Yet he added on, "They still forgive you, y'know."

Time blurred as I watched the glass in Clyde's eyes disappear, rather he was smiling and moving his mouth. I watched as he raised my fork and sliced a piece for himself—I knew these events were happening. Yet no sound registered in my mind. No sound from the outside, at least, because all I could hear was him a minute ago, repeating over and over—

_They _

_didn't_

_drown. _

**.xxx.**

When I returned home, the first thing I did was retrieve my camcorder. After removing the memory card, I inserted it into my computer and pulled up the video of Clyde and me. All the while, I was calling Impa's name repeatedly with a rise of my voice in each repetition.

"Zelda?" It didn't take long for Impa to appear into my room. "Zelda, is something the matter?"

My finger strolled through the video length, before pausing the moment I pushed the panna cotta toward me. With my eyes on the screen, I whispered, "Watch."

"_When I was younger, I watched my friends die,"_ I heard myself say. _"What about you?" _

"_On this same subject?_" There was a rise and fall of his shoulders. _"Rakau got beat up a lot because he wasn't human. I intervened at first because it wasn't right, but after that, it was just 'cause he grew on me. After that, he let me hang around with the Zora crowd a lot." _The expression on my face was slightly pathetic as I recalled that even Zora royalty had human friends, while my younger self had not. _"Hey, Zelda."_

"_What?" _

My breath caught as I heard him ascertain that I had not hallucinated. "_They didn't drown._" In the screen, my expression froze with stunned confusion while Clyde's was all glassy-eyed smiles. "_They still forgive you, y'know._"

My finger tapped, pausing the video.

A moment passed before Impa spoke up. "What is the meaning of this?"

Running my fingers through my hair, it led to my ponytail's undoing. My headband also fell off slightly, so I ripped it off, whispering, "Do you remember Sheik and Tetra?"

"Certainly." Thoughtfully, Impa tucked a white lock behind her ear. "They were companions you had created from your imagination and therefore you could only see. I believed you thought that I could see them as well."

"Wha-what did I tell you? About their disappearance?"

Impa looked off to the side. "They set off to Termina."

"Impa?"

"Your Highness?"

"I... I lied." Her gaze focused on me when I was whispering my confession, "I watched them, Impa. I watched Tetra fall off the bridge and I watched Sheik dive after her and I watched and I stood there, watching—_that's all I did._" Impa forwarded to wrap her arms around me and I did not understand why there were tears staining her blouse. "And then when I didn't see anyone surfacing, I panicked and left. I just left them to drown."

Brushing my stray strands aside, Impa spoke words of comfort, "Zelda, there is nothing to shed tears over. They were not real. You know that."

"But how does he know that?!" In disbelief, I turned back to Clyde in screen, saying, "_They didn't drown_."

From above, I could hear Impa's steady breathing, yet her voice lowered. "I do not have an answer for that."

"_They still forgive you, y'know._"

My head hazy, I whispered, "I didn't know he existed before this. I didn't know his brother. I didn't even know Finn. Impa, I didn't even tell you! And I trust you above anyone else, Impa, but I didn't tell a living soul! I was certain that no one would know..." I ran my hands through my hair multiple times, thinking too much of the inexplicable impossibility. "How in Hyrule did he know?"

In the video, Clyde had lifted the fork of panna cotta to his mouth and swallowed thoughtfully. "_Man, you have got to taste, like this is the heavens in your mouth._" With a glorified grin, he laughed, "_Don't I know it_."

**[…]**

* * *

><p><strong>Next chapter is mission 1 out of 12. Will be more exciting than finding an obsessive man find homes for his rabbits. I think. <strong>

**Special thanks to _Eternal Nocturne_! ya knows what's up :)))) also Happy Holidays everyone!**

**~ loveandzelink**


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